Posts tagged faith
A Cloud of Sacred Pain

The morning I read the news I am sitting at my basement office desk. Facebook alerts me to a new message. It is over. She has passed. My coworker sits ten feet away. Without emotion, I say "Oh no. I just got really bad news." I feel numb. I tell her my friend has died and how it happened. I don't look at her as I speak. She is kind, but how does one respond? Moments later she has gone upstairs and my Spotify begins to play "Crack the Case" by DAWES.

Those heartbreaking opening swells. That piano transitioning from major to minor. That gentle guitar. My eyes water and I know I can't stay here. I can't sit and live life as if nothing has happened. I can't let myself fall apart either. Not here.

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How to Fight for Hope

Here is what I'm sure of; hope is worth fighting for.

The older I get, the less I seem to know. I have plenty of information and access to infinitely more. What I'm lacking is Truth. Certainty. Faith in the world being a certain way, always.

I do know that hope remains vital. Not hope filled with promises, but possibilities. I continue to cling to the ability to imagine a better world and a better life.

Today I'm learning a little more about how hope works. It has a lot to do with love.

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Song Story - "I Want To Be Known" Is A Song Born In The Cold And Dark

When you hear the horns on I Want To Be Known, you'd never know the darkness it came from. Horns often herald something glorious, but I wasn't writing from a place of triumph or fanfare. I wrote this song from defeat. 

The melody found me in the mountains just outside of Canmore, Alberta. 

My wife and I escaped the city for our anniversary weekend. The air was crisp but warm enough for a winter walk. Snow fell like stars and–best of all–our Air BnB had a hot tub. 

I needed this break. 

I'd just learned that yet another job I'd been hoping for fell through. I was overqualified, which, to me, reads "you're a great fit somewhere, just not here." 

I felt like a misfit. Out of place. Adrift.

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Song Story: Wherever You Are

I wrote Wherever You Are (the first version, at least) around 2007 in the early days of a church I was helping plant. We were a group of hip zealous young people and world-wizened elders wanting to change the world. Or at least the Church. Or at least our selves. I think we succeeded in that last part.

I was confused, coming unmoored from the constraints of my fundamentalist evangelical upbringing. It felt like a drift and I wondered if I would be OK. How far could I wander and still come home? But then I thought heard a Voice call from somewhere out in the fog. 

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